The Journey of Anchoring in Her Gift
God spoke to the prophet Jeremiah and said, “Before I formed thee in the belly I knew thee; and before thou camest forth out of the womb I sanctified thee, and I ordained thee a prophet unto the nations” (Jeremiah 1:5).
“For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, saith the Lord, thoughts of peace, and not of evil, to give you an expected end” (Jeremiah 29:11).
I can’t help but wonder,
From what cloth am I formed?
Our Father lives in me. Thus, what have I inherited? What is my portion?
What am I sanctified for?
What am I ordained to do?
What is my expected end? And what sequence of events will bring it to fulfillment?
As the journey of life unfolds toward that expected end, I believe that one milestone we must all encounter is the moment we behold the gift God has given to us.
When that day came for me, I understood that I had been given the gift of vision and of hearing the voice of God; yet my ability to see and hear exists only within the counsel of God and will only grow from here.
I hear the words He speaks as the Angel of God unveils them to me.
God entrusted to me the His oracles (Romans 3:2) and gave me the keys of the kingdom of heaven (Matthew 13:11), that I might make known His utterances concerning His counsel as they are revealed to me. As Jesus revealed to me, “I have eyes like a flame of fire” (Revelation 2:18).
When I discovered that God entrusted me with His words, and I could communicate them as divine counsel to myself, I could hardly believe it.
At first I had doubts, but God kept confirming to me that this ability is real and that there is purpose in His power.
From then on, I knew how the gift worked, but was still not sure if I was using it in the right way.
It led me down this hole of sorrow, wondering how could I have such a gift with no direction or instructions on what to do next?
Because of these uncertainties, I felt mentally and spiritually homeless. I’ve never felt so lost on Earth.
When I turned to God for answers, I kept hearing the same message about what I was called to do, but never how or in what way to do it.
It honestly felt like I was walking in circles, looking for answers hidden between the line, but only left with empty spaces. At times this discouraged me, but I never gave up.
Finally, in a moment of surrender and defeat, I had a dream:
I was on a raised platform where Scripture is usually read and preaching takes place, seated at a writing table.
The Father of the house lifted me up and called me worthy (1 Timothy 4:9). Yet He also showed me that He was restraining His power within me, and that this restraint was an act of discipline.
God revealed to me that I needed correction. As I said before, I did not know how, where, or why to use the gift given to me, and God told me I was right to be confused.
He helped me see that the way I was using it at the time restrained how God’s power was meant to operate fully within me. This is because I am designed to dwell in the house of Christ and to look out from its window, seeing only what He chooses to show me through that lens.
Yet I often used my ability to see in ways that aimed to please myself or others. In other words, I only cared to see what interested and benefited me.
God taught me that if I use my gift to please men, then I am in no position to be a servant of Christ (Galatians 1:10). My spiritual gift is not meant for my own benefit or for another purpose; it must be used directly in service to Christ, in the very way it was formed to be used.
God also highlighted another issue:
My behavior at the time reflected a division from Christ, as though I were living apart from Him (1 Corinthians 1:13), even though I am a joint-heir with Christ.
The bible says, “…all things are of God, who hath reconciled us to himself by Jesus Christ, and hath given to us the ministry of reconciliation to understand that God was in Christ, reconciling the world unto himself…and hath committed unto us the word of reconciliation.” (2 Corinthians 5:18–19)
So why am I living in division? Why am I trying to exercise a divine ability in the realm of the flesh rather than in the Spirit with the One who gave it to me?
The Father lives in me, and His ability to create and form, demonstrated in the book of Genesis also dwells and is at work in me. So, I’m in no position to use the gift bestowed upon me for myself.
It is His eyes that give me vision; His voice from which I hear counsel; and His power that works through me.
So, I decided moving forward that I will use my gift differently, not to see for my own personal gain, but for His gain. It’s His eyes give me vision, not mine; it’s His counsel I hear from His voice, not mine; it’s His power, not mine. So, when I use this gift, it’s the holy spirit that is at work, not me.
What follows is my mantra; the promise I made to myself to always stand by.
“What I see is what I hear. What I hear is what I write. What I write is what I publish here.“
And that is exactly what you will find on this blog: counsel from His lips, guidance from His eyes, His commandments revealed, and His judgments made known.
I am honored to be chosen for such an assignment as this. But it is important to know that every word published here first worked in me. God gave me a clear command for being a blogger, “…we walk by the same rule, and we mind the same thing” (Philippians 3:16).
Conclusion
I am so proud of myself and I know that God is looking down at me, saying, “well done.”
In the past, I kept deleting my blog entries due to never feeling content with what I was writing; I always knew something was wrong. But now, striving lawfully in this gift given unto me (2 Timothy 2:5), crowned with knowledge (Proverbs 14:18), I am led by God with boldness and confidence to write again.
God instructed me to begin with “Her Bible Verse of the Day.”
The verse was perfect: “He that hath an ear, let him hear what the Spirit saith unto the churches” (Revelation 3:13).
In other words, “What does the Spirit of God say to those living in the body of Jesus Christ, the Anointed One?”
I’m looking forward to hearing from God, because it continues the lesson He has already begun teaching me: how to live, and what manner to follow while carrying a spiritual gift, yielded under the hand of that gift.
Stay tuned for the next blog to read the response the Spirit of God has revealed unto me!